I have been having Bowen Therapy now for about 18 months after a chance meeting in the local health shop. At the time I was searching for remedies in a very depressed state and finding it difficult to establish which one of my ailments was causing me the most distress at that time! I had been having very painful periods, lots of migraine type headaches and IBS. I felt in my own mind that the root of all my problems lie in my emotional state. I was very stressed and at the times when I seemed to have little stress in my life, I would soon find something! I had suffered from an Eating Disorder from the age of 14 and, at 43, despite recently having effective counselling for the first time, still felt that there were areas where I was ‘stuck’ emotionally.

Austin was incredibly supportive, kind and compassionate from that first meeting despite me bursting into tears and feeling very foolish. He was convinced that Bowen Therapy could help me although, I have to confess that I was a little sceptical at the time and very very scared. Austin warned me and infact, he took the time to also explain to my husband that the treatment may well throw up some emotional issues which, ultimately, we would both have to deal with. The treatments, I was also warned could bring on symptoms for a short time and indeed they did. I had times when I felt very muzzy and light headed or like someone had hit me at the back of the head with a sledgehammer. Again, I was told only to be concerned if the symptoms lasted for more than a few days. Austin was always willing to talk on the phone if I needed to.

I do feel that in order for any therapy to be effective, you have to have a good relationship with your therapist and to trust them. Although the therapy involves some fairly intrusive procedures, Austin was always professional in his approach and made me feel at ease. Discussions were also quite personal due to some of the difficulties which I had faced in trying to cope with my Eating Disorder but I never felt embarrassed at sharing them with Austin. He has made me see many things in a different light and helped me to gain confidence in myself as both an adult and, more importantly, as a woman.

At the time that we met, I found it almost impossible to eat out and staying away from home was very difficult. I still find some of these things difficult but I am a lot better. I am slowly working my way around the world in culinary terms. I have already been to Japan a few times (I just love Japanese food!) Spain, Armenia and Morroco. I have Persia and Korea high on my list to try next! I am not quite so scared at facing a completely new restaurant with an unknown menu especially when with my husband who has been a huge ‘rock’ for me for the past 20 years. I have also stayed away from home for a few days by a combination of taking some foods with me and being able to eat out.

I have also learned to accept my body for what it is much more readily. Yes – I have cellulite along with the rest of the female population and I have lumps and bumps where I would rather not have them but I am not 19 any more and I am learning to accept that I can like myself for who I am. I also feel much more in control of my life and the choices which I can make. I no longer have to live by those strict rules which were imposed upon me as a child and I do not make judgements about people like my parents did and infact still do now.

I once wrote a poem to my colleagues at work trying to explain my Eating Disorder and to quote a verse from it:-

‘It’s not about trying to be really thin,
But about self esteem – fear of not fitting in
An attempt to control things which don’t go quite right,
With food as the weapon – an internal fight’

I now know that I have to weigh a healthy weight in order to be strong enough to deal with the ups and downs of life and I also know that I can never get on with the whole population of the world. However, I do not have to conquer life on my own and there always people whom you can turn to to help. Food is no longer a weapon but rather, something to be enjoyed and to share, with those that you love. When times are hard and situations difficult I have learned that it is even more important to look after yourself – not punish yourself for things that are beyond your control.

I have also learned to forgive. Most of all perhaps, my parents – I believe that it is the hardest job out there , being a parent and no one sets out to screw it up or to produce a child with an Eating Disorder. They did the best they thought they could at the time and I am a stronger more grounded person for what I have been through. Although both my parents do and say things which I do not agree with I can now celebrate the fact that I do not have to follow their lead any more – I have a whole choice of decisions to make for myself.

Bowen, although a physical therapy has helped me more in an emotional way, to cope with my Eating Disorder. I am learning to see life as more of a series of challenges rather than problems, and I try to applaud myself for trying something even if it doesn’t work out, rather than feeling a constant failure. I am happier to ask for help if I need it rather than feeling that that is another admission of failure and most of all, I can love and respect myself.

I no longer have an Eating Disorder dominating my life. Yes – it is still there ‘waiting in the wings’ but I am in control of it. It is safe to be ME without hiding behind it. It is safe to slowly let it out of my life and to allow myself to be happy and live a fulfilling life with fun, laughter and enjoyment.

M. Ivybridge